The Six States Solution

Obama, my radical friend, let me introduce you to the pains of the Middle East. Maybe you have seen the images of exploding buses in Tel Aviv and exploding children in Gaza, but this is only the special effects, and this cannot compensate the lack of script, the lack of vision, and the lack of hope in the region. Despair and hatred have over flown a long time ago. There is no solution except of stagnation. They will all tell you that – Zionists and Islamists alike – they will all engrave pain on their foreheads, trying to compare which one suffers more.
So I proudly present the Swiss version of survival and coexistence – but with walls, barbwires, checkpoints, and fear: so no two states solution but six –

1. Tel Aviv and the Coastline - - - The Economic/Democratic powerhouse state, AKA the rich bitch.
2. The Gaza Strip - - - A new strip is born and it's very far from Vegas - an Islamic run state in the glorious tradition of the region. No gambling on money, only human lives will take into consideration. AKA the crazy bitch.
3. Galilee and the North - - - Arab villages alongside Jewish villages, all in an effort to make a buck on Christian pilgrims. AKA the 'Jesus freak' bitch.
4. The Negev Desert - - - A sister state to the laid back Sinai Peninsula. A Bedouin entity with no statehood. They will smuggle everything for the other bitches in the region. They might legalize Marijuana as well. AKA the 'Hot N' Dry' bitch.
5. Jerusalem - - - A Masterpiece of walls, checkpoints, and hate. I think enough said about this wonderland. AKA the holy bitch.
6. The West Bank - - - The work force of the rich bitch. Lovely Arabs that understand Money. AKA the exploited bitch.

The six will form the United States of the Middle East, AKA USME (pronounced Use-Me). An elected Israeli-Arab president will handle it all.
Too radical for you my friend? It worked in Switzerland… but we're not watchmakers. We are Zionists and Islamists and Nationalists and Communists and Fascists and racists, but we're not radicals like the Swiss. We will do the best of our ability to remain divided, and we will not make watches! Time is too unifying. Hence, the pain remains. And the sick states of the Middle East will not be cured.